I completely lack coherence. So I present “Thirteen Stories About One Thing”
ONE
Random, hysterical laughter and then “Did you watch Dawson’s Creek in high school” (Because if even I watched Dawson’s Creek, than clearly every female on the planet watched Dawson’s Creek.)
“I watched Dawson’s Creek in college!”
“Ok, well remember that Dawson’s dad got killed, because he…
“…went out to get milk, and then got in a car accident…”
“…because he was eating an ice cream cone, and he dropped it, AND THEN HE TRIED TO PICK IT UP…”
“Yeah, so if you drop you’re ice cream, don’t try and pick it up.”
“What a stupid way to kill off a character.”
-Me & Xina, after a shopping jaunt
TWO
Me: Ooo, Pretty Woman is on.
Brent: What?!? You awful person!
Me: Shut up, I love this movie
Brent: You’re the last person in the world I would expect to love that movie.
Me: Shut up, I know, it’s shameful. I think every female has this chip in her head that makes her like this movie.
Brent: But you hate Julia Roberts!
Me: I know!
Brent: I’m going to use this against you. And Richard Gere is awful
Me: I know! But he buys her lots of clothes. And she saves him!
Brent: Richard Gere is awful
Me: I know! That’s why Primal Fear is so cool, because Edward Norton totally got him.
-Spring Break, last year.
Edward Norton was crazy, smart, manipulative and so-o cute in that movie. Hm. Typical.
THREE
It doesn’t make sense that someone as rational, cynical and paranoid as I, is at times incredibly idealistic and a ridiculous romantic. (I adore alliteration!). I also wonder if I should be saying: It doesn’t make any sense that someone as idealistic and romantic as me could be so cynical, rational and paranoid.
-Now the two sides will engage in a fight.
FOUR
The rational answer is the easiest to come up with but the hardest to actually put into action, which upsets everyone greatly since they prefer coming up with grand theories, acting like schmucks and then mourning over the fact that they’re not acting as they should
-Wednesday, the younger, wiser sibling (though I am still way cooler!)
FIVE
It is part of a follow-the-leader game of second best we have all been playing — Rose with Simon, Simon with me, me with Stephen, and Stephen, I suppose, with Lea. It isn’t a very good game, the people you play it with are apt to get hurt. You can only ask ‘Why’, even though you won’t be satisfied with the answer. It isn’t a bit of use my pretending I’m not crying, because I am. Pause to sober up. Better now
-I Capture the Castle, 342
SIX
It’s very easy to be critical and angry and vengeful. Vengence is easy, virtue is more difficult. But what’s virtuous isn’t always right.
You can be an enormous, painfully critical bitch when you’re not being stupid
-Thursday, sibling, again
SEVEN
NascentIgnorance: later stupid
Just Rachel 129: fuck you stupid
NascentIgnorance: shut up stupid
Just Rachel 129: you started it stupid
Just Rachel 129: I’m glad we have such a loving relationship
NascentIgnorance: you wouldn’t want it any other way
-”If I’m crazy then it’s true, that it’s all because of you, and you wouldn’t want me, any other way” Because, you saved me in 6th grade from being a typical girl, even if I do like Dawson’s Creek & Pretty Woman
EIGHT
I know prospero wins and there is some subtext about government
-Brent, on the Tempest
NINE
Laugh at the things that formally bound you
-Shakespeare Class on Thursday
TEN
I want to go scoff at Camp Hamp for failing in it’s attempt to turn me into a communist, filthy feminazi. In fact, that really, really screwed up because I’m a capitalist, and
ELEVEN
“I’m independent and I can take care of myself, but what I really want is a hot, emotionally detached workaholic man to fall in love with me because I’m so wonderful”
-Circa August, drunken whinings that the hippies would certainly say was an example of how the patriarchy has gotten to me.
TWELVE
Anyone want to go on a day trip to Amherst soon-ish? I would definitely buy you dinner and protect you from the dirty hippies You’ll get the chance to see the Hampshire bubble up close, a hellish representation of why utopia shouldn’t exist
THIRTEEN
Joy is not a state of being. It’s an activity. It doesn’t exist independently of our actions. Joy is supposed to be fleeting and transitory because it was never meant to be permanant.
Mono-no-aware, “The sadness of all things.” The sadness that informs everything, evne joy itself. Without that, joy cannot exist. Joy is what we do, joy is pagan, and absurd and tinged with lust and sadness. Bliss is not. Bliss is death.
-”Happiness” – pg247
