I spent Sunday night laying about, reading the first four books of the Little House on the Prairie set and eating sushi. 

I spontaneously took the train to Ridgewood on Saturday and went to see Brenty. We went to Hillside for ‘quality time’. Our wacky drive was a creative way to Jersey City (Last exit off of Route 4, and then drove through Fort Lee, Edgewater, Weehawken, etc. I believe it’s the Weehawken area where things get creepy; it’s ALL condos and little Sim City enclosed communities along the Hudson. I am sure they are outrageously expensive. Also, that is where Alexander Hamilton and Aaron Burr dueled. (Note to the younger-wiser-sibling: It is unclear whether they were dualists.)

I am reading “Inventing Japan: 1853-1964” because it is only about 200 pages, and I hope it will make up for the fact that I never, ever paid attention or did the reading for the Japan part of “Comparative Politics of India and Japan” two years ago. I remember lots of stuff about India, (SHINING INDIA) but nothing about Japan other than never mix sake with any other alcohol and, regarding the Jews “you guys are alright, but…”

I really, really hope to find an apartment tonight, because I want to go out for Czech food with my co-workers tomorrow. Mmm, Czech food. And Czech beer. I adore Eastern Europe! Blah, blah, blah, debate about whether the Czech Republic is still “Eastern Europe.” You can’t take the Government major out of the girl. Which is why I’m going to grad school, for which I should be writing an essay. …and full circle!

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Grrrr. Anyway. The applications are in. They are out of my hands. Cross your fingers for me.

I’ve just finished Ignorance by Milan Kundera. It was a lovely little novella. What I adore about Kundera is the way in which he seamlessly blends philosophy into his narrative. He is nothing short of lyrical. He uses very little dialogue. He captures a train of thought

This guy I used to know was mildly befuddled by the way my mind worked. The way it was never quiet, keeping me away as it delved deeply into each topic is jumped to – because his mind worked so differently. So one night, when I couldn’t sleep, I just wrote down a train of thought. I used a lot of parenthesis for the asides, in many cases double sets of parenthesis. There’s no way I could explain to someone the way I think. I had to show it by writing down what I was thinking. That’s what Kundera does. There’s very little action, and even less conversation. But you understand so well what’s going on, and why the characters are doing things, because you’ve read their thoughts. This isn’t a unique device, but the way in which he wields it is so insanely…evocative. I don’t necessarily remember the characters names, or the details of the plot, but I remember the asides.

I can’t say I try to emulate him, because I was writing in a long-winded, descriptive style long before I read my first Kundera novel (The Incredible Lightness of Being, which is simply beautiful) but it’s always nice to find an author who has perfected the art of the overwrought. Kundera has also “literary zinged” me, hardcore.

Every love relationship rests on an unwritten agreement unthinkingly concluded by the lovers in the first weeks of their love. They are still in a kind of dream but at the same time, without knowing it, are drawing up, like uncompromising lawyers, the detailed clauses of their contract. O lovers! Be careful in those dangerous first days! Once you’ve brought breakfast in bed you’ll have to bring it forever, unless you want to be accused of loveless ness and betrayal.

In the first weeks of their love, it was decided between Karol and Marketa that Karol would be the unresponsive and Marketa would accept it, but that Marketa would have the right to be the better of the two and Karol would feel guilt. No one knew better than Marketa how sad it is to be better. She was better, but only for lack of anything better. With eloquent concision, it expressed the entire situation of her life: everything Marketa did she did for Karol and because of Karol.

When she was young, she had almost been too free. An old English teacher had watched her and laughed,  “I feel sorry for the man who marries you Marketa,” he said. “No one will be able to reign you in.” So why, why did she do this to herself? Why did she continue to cause herself pain? Why, like Sisyphus, did she continue to push a bolder up the hill?  The weight of her marriage crashed down upon her.
She no longer enjoyed being better.
-From the Book of Laughter and Forgetting. Zinged. June 2004

So the apartment thing is turning into a circus. I’m already stressed about it, so I’m not going to write about it, especially because the situation changes every ten minutes. I can be online, but not on the phone at work, and being out of touch is maddening. Every problem that crops up has to be solved “like, yesterday.”

However, last night was surprisingly de-stressing. I saw King Kong, officially breaking my streak of only going to the movies on X-Mas Day. I had no expectations for the movie, but I enjoyed it, and it was very well done. Except for the freakish amount of critter-y things. Mutant bug things that can crawl all over you squick me out. There were parts where I had to just close my eyes, because I have issues with watching an attack of Giant Many-Legged Bugs. I am cringing just thinking about it. I also very much liked the 1930s era New York scenery.

I have tomorrow off. The transit strike wouldn’t affect my commute if it happens. CK & I were both bragging about how, coming from Jersey, the transit strike won’t affect our commutes. (We took a moment to pound knuckled and declare that Jersey rulz #1, yo) Since we’re similarly minded, we were both saying we hope the strike happens so we can watch all the chaos unfold. As CK said, “there’s nothing better than spite!”

And it’s December 15^th, and so in honor of that I repeat; Always. And remind myself that somewhere in this insanity, I must make time to make a phone call!

]]> http://rachelnotrebecca.com/2005/12/15/eeek-and-pretty-literature/feed/ 0 http://rachelnotrebecca.com/2005/12/13/3329/ http://rachelnotrebecca.com/2005/12/13/3329/#comments Tue, 13 Dec 2005 17:47:00 +0000 Rachel Not Rebecca http://rachelnotrebecca.com/?p=3329 I’ve already lost the hat that I so smartly purchased, and this was the wrong morning to be without a hat. I am probably going to be reduced to buying an “I ‘Heart’ NY” hat from one of the touristy vendors by my office. It will probably cost $12. Yay Midtown-Tourist District. I’m at 52^nd and 7^th, so I’m mere blocks away from Rockefeller Center and the awful, awful tree (stolen from Wayne, NJ!) and Radio City Music Hall and the area is simply teeming with stupid tourists.

I really hope the MTA goes on strike because

a) It won’t affect me

b) I enjoy chaos (which is very un-Hobbesian of me!)

c) I like the fear-mongering in the media. Especially because it is also supposed to snow on Thursday

I am drinking disgustingly bad coffee that I bought at the kiosk downstairs. However, the bad coffee is kind of growing on me, and it does its job.

Also, I am a walking Ann Taylor ad today. Except for the functional footwear.

Apartment drama continues. I go back and forth between really, really wanting to stay in my place and wanting to just move and not deal with the increased rent/lease hassle, so I am making lots of phone calls and playing with budget numbers, and being all Type-A. And Brent would make my life sooo much easier if he would get over his “I don’t want to live with a girl” nonsense.

NYU: COMPLETE
Columbia: COMPLETE
U Texas: COMPLETE
U Chicago: COMPLETE
U Washington: I don’t think I want to apply there anymore. C’mon, what the hell would I do in Seattle?

Mystery School: COMPLETE

February Apps:
U Oregon: Half way done
Rutgers: Half done
Dallas: Not even started

But the December apps are in, the fellowship applications will be in by the end of the week, and I am basically convinced I will not get in anywhere, because Favorite-Professor won’t submit her online recommendations on time. Which is mildly ironic, because her stated pet-peeve is “Students who ask for extensions.” Hmph.

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So with very little knowledge of NYC neighborhoods, I set out to hunt for an apartment. I ignored Manhattan completely, thinking I could never afford it as I did not want to live above 125th street. (I have several friends who are Manhattan snobs who attest “Manhattan ends at 125th street”…one purist insists “Anything above 96th street is the Bronx.”).

Just Rachel 129: you live in brooklyn heights now, right?
asterphage: yeah, but this place is for chumps
Just Rachel 129: why is that?
asterphage: this housing place sucks more over time
asterphage: and rich folks areas are never any good
asterphage: the restaurants are mild and overly classy, the stores are uninteresting
Just Rachel 129: what’s a non-chump neighborhood in brookyln?
asterphage: i don’t really know
asterphage: practically anywhere is decent
Just Rachel 129: i mean, i’d love to live on the lower east side, but i’m not a rich trust fundie
asterphage: also it’s unbearable down there
asterphage: i wouldn’t want to live over by the shitty little overpriced designer shops and expensive little cafes and crap
Just Rachel 129: upper manhattan seems like it sucks
asterphage: why would you even look at uptown? even if you could afford it? uptown is for middle aged professionals who are afraid of things outside their life, and for people who are raising families

With a bit of research I found Park Slope and Williamsburg were considered cool places to live in Brooklyn, and Astoria in Queens was also quite nice (I never did get out to Astoria, I probably should have).

Just Rachel 129: i’ve been going to a lot of roommate interviews. they are incredibly depressing
Just Rachel 129: picture a job interview, only more like middle school
asterphage: wow, that sucks
Just Rachel 129: i’ve been to a few cattle call style open houses, and several others where i was interviewed and given the “tell us about yourself” thing
asterphage: that’s really fucked up, the cattle calls
asterphage: the interviews are fairly reasonable i guess
Just Rachel 129: i think they are, except when they’re mean to you
Just Rachel 129: “why do you think we should want you to live with us”
Just Rachel 129: and then they smirk at each other
Just Rachel 129: and then you know they’re making fun of you the second you leave
asterphage: if that happened
asterphage: i would be like “go fuck yourself, this place isn’t nice enough for me to deal with smug assholes.”
Just Rachel 129: right, i should be more confrontational
asterphage: i mean jesus, what kind of people are these? lower east side pretentious hipsters?
Just Rachel 129: all in park slope, so far

This went on for about three weeks. I looked in Park Slope, and Williamsburg, Beford L-stop. Williamsburg seemed great – it’s on the water and most of the buildings have roof access so you get pretty views.

But again, the people were total assholes

asterphage: this is why anything that is cool sucks
Just Rachel 129: like, my attitude is, these are the neighborhoods i might like to live in so i’m searching there. if i find roommates i can hang out with sometimes, great. if not, we’re all adults and we can be civil to each other.
asterphage: right, at some point though, does it start to seem like maybe the people in these neighborhoods are not the kind of people you want to be around?
Just Rachel 129: it does
Just Rachel 129: i love williamsburg, bedford stop, it’s on the water, it’s so nice. but everyone has been a total asshole
asterphage: did i not tell you that hipster neighborhoods are so not cool
asterphage: williamsburg = fuck dat

So I went back to what had been my plan last February, before I was even seriously considering a city move. I would look in Jersey City. The apartments in the Jersey City financial district are new, and clean, and have normal people living in them. It’s not NYC, but it’s on the PATH. It’s on the river for good walking at night.

Just Rachel 129: i’m looking at apartments in jersey city, because i’m not hipster enough for brooklyn
Just Rachel 129: brooklyn = lots of people like hampshire students
ZGoTenksZ: hippies
Just Rachel 129: hip-sters
ZGoTenksZ: what’s the difference?
Just Rachel 129: hipsters shower
Just Rachel 129: i’ll probably wind up remaining true to my jersey roots & move to Jersey City
ZGoTenksZ: so? you’ll get a bigger place for same money
Just Rachel 129: i don’t know. i want an NYC zip code, cuz i’m shallow
Just Rachel 129: but jersey city is probably better for me than brooklyn
ZGoTenksZ: why?
Just Rachel 129: the people there are professionals and not hipsters
ZGoTenksZ: so…go to jersey city then
ZGoTenksZ: you pay less tax

(and we all know how I feel about tax!)

And then Saturday morning, I stumbled upon the perfect apartment. A small room on the third floor, with a normal roommate. He just wants to find a quiet, sane person, because his good friend from college is moving into his spot in late August, and she wants a female roommate. “I got hundreds of replies to my ad,” he told me on the phone. “And yours is one of the only one’s that I’m answering.”

Sitting in Starbucks, taking that call on Friday, I was pretty sure this was going to be the apartment.

Just Rachel 129: i’m moving to jersey city in august. It’s not manhattan, but you can’t beat the commute, and I can stay true to my jersey roots
Five tenn: hell yeah…and babe, you are a jersey girl.

Yes. Yes I am.

But yes. Tomorrow begins my insane job interview schedule.

And that is all I have to say. When I get in this, forgive the term, mindset, I’m too busy acting to think.