Lex asked me this morning if I’d had fun and I replied honestly, “not really.” She repeated to me what I already know; that it will get easier. That I don’t have to love these people, but it’s better to go, because maybe I’ll get something small out of it. Yeah, yeah. I’ve always said that I either click with people, or I don’t. If I don’t click with someone, I can certainly be friendly with them, but I never wind up bonding with them. I have always gotten very strong first impressions of people. I realize that saying my first impressions of people are almost always right is perhaps a self-fulfilling prophecy, but I have too many examples where I doubted my first instincts, and it only led to bad things.

So no, it didn’t “click” with any of these girls, and that’s fine. I was feeling kind of lousy about it while I was driving home, but I just have to keep reminding myself that this is me. This is nothing new. And for whatever uncomfortableness I felt sitting at that table, I’m still not as bad as I used to be. I don’t think I’ll go out with them every week, because by Thursday, I’m pretty exhausted from my semi-crazy schedule. But at least I know I have a place to go if I’m ever craving diner food.