Examples of Skidmore’s Touchy-Feely, Everyone Is A Unique & Beautiful Snowflake, Over-the-top Anti-Dog-Eat Dog Liberalism

1) The Greens are changing their name to something equivalent to “Students for Everything that is Good and Fluffy Bunnies” Actually they’re changing their name to “Students for Peace and Justice” (or something) which makes sense because:
a) the only thing they did last year was protest the war
b) The actual Green Party is technically supposed to be a single interest party, the environment. And we already have an environment club.

2) Instead of having debates between SYRA and the Greens (the fluffy bunny club) we have to have roundtables, because debates are too scary and offensive. Plus if the table we use is actually round, then its nice, and equivalent, and non-offensive.

3) There is a new a cappella group forming for all the people who didn’t make the real a cappella groups. If you are a male, you have the chance to try out for two groups. If you are female there are THREE groups, and one of them isn’t very good in the first place. If you don’t make it into any of those groups, there is a reason. Plus, the posters for the group are all like “Feeling Rejected, etc etc.” Well, they are not just feeling rejected they WERE rejected. For a reason.

4) There is a radio show for the discussion of political issues. It is called “The Liberal Democratic Cause”

5) The Greens are whining about the town of Saratoga Springs taking away “our” voting booth. Never mind the fact that there are not voting booths in hospitals, nursing homes, etc. Apparently, voting is not that important to them, or to anyone on Skidmore campus who is “convinced” to vote here because they can’t go downtown to do so. Because to get downtown they’d either have to a) drive, and we know the greens think cars are evil or something. b) walk, and that’s hard, because the greens like to go barefoot (including this girl in my feminist political thought class who puts her bare, dirty feet on the table right next to me)

6) Our new motto for admissions material is “Creative Thought Matters” ie, everyone is a unique and beautiful snowflake, and with the amount of money we paid some PR people, this new slogan cost tens of thousands of dollars a word.

7) LS curriculum has been changed, in part, because people weren’t doing well enough, because they apparently can’t write simple 5 page papers

8. We’re cutting men’s hockey, which will cause freshman and sophomore guys to transfer out, and giving money to girls sports, even though we are already in Title 9 Compliance. And the money is going to the volleyball team (we have a volleyball team?????) and increasing Yoga classes.